How to Have More Calm Through Busy Days Without Losing Yourself
There’s a version of chaos that looks loud—missed drop-offs, late meetings, unanswered texts.
And then there’s the quieter chaos: the kind where you’re doing everything but slowly disappearing inside it. That’s where I found myself …full time working mom navigating deadlines, school schedules, and the constant pull of other people’s needs. I had no margin, I felt overwhelmed, exhausted, anxious.
Something inside me realized that I needed to change. Same actions, same results. My goals needed to change, and I began to learn how to move from chaos toward calm—one small choice at a time.
What “Less Chaos” Actually Means
Less chaos doesn’t mean:
- A spotless house
- A color-coded calendar
- Never feeling rushed
It means:
- You know what matters today
- You can recover after hard moments
- You don’t abandon yourself to get through the day
Calm isn’t something you arrive at. It’s something you practice daily.
5 Micro Shifts That Create Calm in the Middle of Busy Days
1. Start the day off with one small intention.
Before emails, before kids, before scrolling—take 90 seconds.
Ask yourself:
- What’s the one thing that would make today feel supportive instead of survival-mode?
Write it down. That’s your a one thing. Everything else becomes secondary. Calm starts with intention, not control.
2. Create “Transition Pauses”
Chaos builds when we move too fast from role to role.
Try this:
- After school drop-off or on the way to pick up → take 3 deep breaths; On the drive to school, don’t play music – allow some silence to quiet your mind.
- Upon arrival at work → take a little time to pray or read a devotional to steady your mindset.
- After work → wash your hands slowly and mentally “clock out” as you transition into “mom mode”.
These mental pauses help to calm your nervous system.
3. Lower the Bar (Strategically)
On heavy days, choose:
- Good enough simple meals or take out
- Shorter workouts or a simple walk after dinner
- Head to bed a little earlier with more quiet time before you go to bed
Lowering the bar isn’t quitting—it’s conserving energy so you don’t burn out.
4. Contain the Chaos With One Small System
Chaos grows when everything lives in your head.
Choose one system:
- A single to-do list
- A morning routine you repeat daily
- A nightly reset that takes 10 minutes max
You don’t need more systems.
You need fewer systems you actually use.
5. Come Back to Yourself Before the Day Ends
Even five minutes counts.
Try:
- Sitting quietly without input with a warm cup of calming tea
- Saying a short prayer or breath prayer, my favorite book for THIS
You’re Not Behind — You’re Carrying a Lot
If your life feels loud, it doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong. It means you’re living a full life with real responsibilities. Calm isn’t the absence of chaos. It’s learning how to stay present inside it.
And less chaos starts with permission:
- Permission to slow down
- Permission to have boundaries
- Permission to do this imperfectly
You don’t need a new life. You need gentler rhythms within the one you already have.
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